Goodbye mommy guilt

It is my last week at work. I am taking a self-imposed leave of absence. The baby will be here soon and work is too much for me to deal with right now. I don't have a physically demanding job, but it's still enough that I ache at night and I'm too tired to do anything. This is just one of the many reasons for leaving work now.

I still have a lot to do before baby arrives so I need to free up my schedule so I can get everything done. We don't even have the crib up yet! Plus when I'm at work I'm thinking about all the things I still need to do rather than thinking about work, which is effecting my work performance and at times stressing me out.

The main reason for taking this leave has to do with my two wonderful boys at home. I suffer from mommy guilt and constantly worry that I don't spend enough time with them because I am at work. There's always something I would like to do with them, but work gets in the way. It might be something as big as being able to take them to swimming lessons or something as small as being around to make their lunch each day. I constantly worry that I'm not a good mom because I can't do these things for them. Even on the weekends when I'm at home I have to go grocery shopping or run errands because there is no time for that during the week. So I even feel guilty on the weekends.

Starting next Monday, that all changes. The next two weeks will be mostly about them. I will still have to fit in some time to get some last minute baby things done, but for the most part it is all about the boys. Two wonderful mommy-guilt-free weeks where I won't be working or consumed with a new baby. It's the Must Do List I've always wanted:
1. Go out for ice cream.
2. Spend an afternoon at Snoopers.
3. Go to the Pumpkin Patch.
4. Decorate for Halloween.
5. Spend lots of time at the playground.
6. Go out for ice cream again.
7. Go to the zoo.
8. Go to Auntie Vicki's donut store.
9. Buy our Halloween costumes.
10. Get more ice cream.
This is the list that must get done in the next two weeks. Notice that nowhere does it say get groceries, do laundry, do dishes, or clean house. This is the boys' time. They may have more to add to the list and I'll be more than happy to add it.