Behaving badly in public

Today the kids and I went to Wal-mart. I was putting it off for days. I judge trips to Wal-mart like I judge trips to the gas station. The low fuel light may be on, but I know I still have a good ten more miles. At home, the milk was getting low and I was trying to ride it out all weekend to avoid the errand. Really, I would rather be stranded on the side of the road with an empty gas tank than at home with kids and not a single drop of milk available.

From the moment I got home from work Rion was a pill. Lately, they have all been really good at Wal-mart so I was thinking they would be ok. Boy, was I wrong. First Rion had to use the potty. No problem. Then Torii decided he better go too. No problem again. So I wait and wait and wait and wait for Torii to get done. He tells me it takes time. My patience wearing thin and not a single drop from him, I tell him we have to go and he can try again later.

While we are at Wal-mart I tell the boys it would be a good idea to pick out a Mother's Day card for Grandma while we are there. Torii cried because we weren't getting the Garfield card. Rion kept pulling cards out. Both wanted to listen to every card that made music. Forget it I said. I'll pick one up later.

The boys needed new toothbrushes so we make our way over to that section. Now Rion is deciding that not only does he want to walk 10 feet behind us, but he also wants to stop many times for no reason. I continue to walk and when we round a corner, he cries because he can't find us. This continues throughout our shopping trip.

Rion wants to look at toys. I walk right by. I tell him he needs to start listening to me first. "I'll listen," he says. "You prove to me that you can and we'll come back to the toys," I tell him. We don't even make it past electronics and he is pulling his stopping for no reason act again. For the rest of the trip I now listen to him whining about looking at toys.

I quickly go through the grocery section and grab what I need. Our last section is produce. Rion spots a small seedless watermelon and wants it. "Let's find another one," I tell him. I'm not about to spend $7 on a watermelon that is smaller than a volleyball. We find full size watermelons for the same price. Better, but they won't even eat half of one so that's out. Now Rion is starting to have a tantrum about getting a watermelon. Finally I find one last cut watermelon on the shelf.

In the checkout line finally. This is the evil south Wal-mart so the lines are long and all my frozen foods are melting and my milk curdling. When will I ever learn just to drive up to the north one to avoid this? I am by now dying of thirst. I give them a mission. Grab me a Diet Coke. They get a regular Coke, but at this point I am not complaining. We are waiting and waiting and waiting in the checkout line. The Coke is over half gone. Torii needs another drink. Rion wants another one too. Torii attempts to hand Rion the Coke, but Rion is playing the game where he says he wants something and then backs out. The Coke hits the floor. The grumpy cashier was nice enough to give me some towels to clean it up. I debated about having her call the cleanup crew to take care of it, but I'm not going anywhere anytime soon so I do it myself. (I just realized I also picked up a Snickers bar while waiting in line. Not going anywhere for awhile? I love irony). So now the Coke is taken away and now all I hear is whining about not getting a drink. The twenty something behind me is now vowing to never ever have kids.

Finally in the car, Rion has calmed down and asks politely for a drink. Ok. He takes the bottle and does nothing but stick his tongue in it. I take the bottle from him and let Torii take a drink. Rion doesn't get the Coke back and now all the way home he whines that he didn't get a drink. Lucky we don't live far.

We get home and suddenly Rion acts the complete opposite. He goes over to the neighbors to say hi and when we get inside, he quietly plays on the computer. He was a perfect boy. Until bedtime that is.