Yes we can!

As we sat in the hospital all week we wondered if we would be home in time to vote. I had been waiting for four years for this election day so I was going to bummed out if we didn't get home in time. The weekend before election day there were non-stop election ads on TV. The local Minnesota ones were really nasty. Especially the Coleman/Franken duel. I'm not sure that one is even decided yet, I think it's in a recount. By the end of our stay I was pretty sick of all the campaign ads. (Really, I was sick of TV in general). On the way home we made one last stop at Jamestown to fill up on gas and get out and stretch. We were getting back into the car when a man stopped us to shake our hands. It was Duane Sand, also filling up and on his way to another stop in the state before the election. I guess he never misses a chance to shake a hand. Anyway, we made it home with a day to spare before the big election. I talked to Rion a little on election day about the adults he would see in the gym, but he didn't really seem to listen. I had never really thought about talking to a five-year-old about this historic election, but they must have talked about it in school. The next day after school he told me Barack Obama had won and that he liked Barack Obama. Know why? Because he likes his name. Rion does say Barack Obama really cute. Then he told me about the White House and he knew the president lived there. Then he thanked me for voting for Barack Obama. I told him he was welcome.

Home

The drive home went well. Cordelia cried some in her car seat, but I could tell she was much happier strapped in her seat than in the hospital. It was really good to see the boys when we got home. I had been trying for days to get Cordelia to laugh, but never could. It took Torii all of a minute after seeing her. I took the week off from work just to make sure Cordelia was going to be ok and also I was exhausted and wanted time just to be at home. Our first couple of days home, we got excited every time she would poop. It was good to know everything was working. Now our goal is to fatten her up. She drinks a lot of Pedisure because it has more calories than milk. Her appetite is as healthy as ever. She eats whenever we eat and snacks a lot too. We have so much Halloween candy in the house so she has been getting some candy. It's not often you hear a doctor give you orders to fatten up so she should enjoy it while it lasts. She seems to be back to herself, but more clingy than before which is understandable. Now we are just settling back into our normal lives.

Getting back on track

On Friday we gave Cordelia some Pedialite. We tried plain first which she didn't like. Then we tried apple Pedialite which she gobbled down. The doctors had told us that sometimes babies aren't interested in food right away, but she was. On Saturday we got to move on to more foods. We had talked to a dietitian about a game plan as far as food went. She was talking about feeding her formula, but I told her we were actually weaning her off the stuff before all this occurred and I really didn't want to go back to formula if at all possible. She had no problem with that so we started her on Pediasure and whole milk. She also got some Cheerios and baby food that day. On Sunday when we arrived at the hospital the nurse told us she had a big poop that morning. And she hadn't had any trouble with any of the food we had been giving her. Not long after the surgeon came in and gave us the clear to leave. We could have stayed another day to make sure everything was alright, but he was confident that she would be just fine. All the nurses would be doing for another day is checking her temperature every once in awhile and giving her Tylenol. We could do that on our own at home. After nine days in Minneapolis we were finally on our way back home.

Livin' in the big city

I've been to Minneapolis many, many times, but always as a tourist. The main purpose of going to Minneapolis is usually to see the Twins play and then a trip to the Mall of America. Or doing some other touristy thing like the zoo or Valley Fair. Never have I experienced Minneapolis the way we did last week. At one time in my life I wanted to live in Minneapolis more than anything in the world. Well, I got over that and I'm happy I did. Although it was quite interesting to kind of live there for a week. I love finding places that are big with the locals. One thing we really enjoyed was a place called the Global Market. It was in a building that Sears and Roebuck built in, I believe, 1929. I took a picture of it because I thought it was so cool. It looked art deco which I love. At night the Midtown letters on top glow in bright green neon. Now the building is used as loft spaces, offices, and the Global Market. The Global Market is made up of many different booth type spaces. Some places sell handmade goods, others are restaurants. It's kind of like an indoor street fair, but everything looks like it could come from Pier One Imports. There's also mini grocery stores with products from all over the world. That's what I would love about living in a big city. Sometimes I get frustrated because I subscribe to Cooking Light and sometimes they have ingredients that you just can't get around here. We ate at the Global Market three different times. The first time we had Mexican, the second time Greek. The third time Fred went back to the Greek stand and I went to a place called Andy's Diner. It looked like an actual retro diner. It was way cool. I ordered a hot roast beef sandwich with mashed potatoes and it was the best meal I had there. This was on the second to last day in the cities and this meal tasted like a home cooked meal. It really hit the spot. We also got some dessert at the Norwegian booth one day. Very good. I will not however miss the traffic in Minneapolis. I told Fred we had been there too long because by mid-week we no longer needed a map to get to where we needed to be. We only got kind of lost once. We were staying at my uncle and aunt's house and one day the construction crew decided to close one of our exits. We thought we had found the detour, but ended up going back the way we had just come. We saw signs that said "Exit closed use alternative routes". Not being from there we had no idea what alternative routes to use. We called my aunt and she told us the alternative routes. The hospital itself is in kind of a rough part of town. Although there are some nice places around the rough areas. We stayed at the Midtown Sheraton which is next to the Midtown building. Very nice hotel. The hospital put us up there for five nights. We saw the prices and they start at $250 a night. If I ever hit it rich I would have no problem paying that much to stay there. Those were the most comfortable beds I have ever slept in. One night we decided to relax a little and went to the hotel bar which was also really nice. And since we were in swanky hotel we decided to be goofy and get swanky drinks on our first round. I ordered a Cosmopolitan and Fred had a Martini. Then Fred talked me into a Long Island Ice Tea. I hadn't had a drink since before I was pregnant with Cordelia so those drinks really did me in. I sure slept good that night. Also around the hospital there were some really nice old mansions. One looked like a castle. I wanted to take a picture of it to show the boys, but we never got around to it. I don't want to say it was fun to see Minneapolis in the way we did because of our circumstances for being there, but it was interesting in experiencing the city in a new way. It really is a cool city and I look forward to finding some more cool non-tourist areas on a fun future trip there.

Long days

After we got back from the Mall of America I did get to hold Cordelia. Although it was a major process to do it. The nurses had to move two machines to the other side of the bed, then lift her over to me on the chair. Then we had to make sure all the cords weren't tangled or underneath her. It was pretty much like that for the next two days. Slowly things got disconnected from her. The first to go was the chest tube. I'm told she didn't cry much. I didn't stay around for that one. I'm pretty sure I had a chest tube when I had surgery on my chest and I don't have good memories of the removal. On Friday the epidural and catheter were taken out. By Friday being in the hospital was getting really old. We were pretty sure the epidural and catheter were going to be taken out that day, but it seemed busy all over the hospital and it was later in the day when those were finally removed. Since Cordelia was doing so great we were told we were also going to move to another floor that day. Up until then we had been on a critical care floor where the nurse to patient ratio is really low. We waited around all day until finally a nurse said that we wouldn't be moving that day. About 8:00 that night Cordelia started falling asleep as I rocked her. I was looking forward to leaving the hospital a little earlier than usual and getting a little extra sleep as well. Then that night's charge nurse came in to tell us that we would be moving to another floor that night. It would be sometime before 11:00, hopefully before Cordelia fell asleep. I looked at her with a very disgusted look on my face and said, "she's almost asleep now!" After venting to Fred he talked to the nurses and magically we got up to the 7th floor shortly after. By the time we got into our new room, the nurses checked vitals and Cordelia fell asleep, it was past 10:00. As soon as we got to the elevators I broke down and tears started flowing. I still hadn't had a good cry since the surgery and this was my breaking point. I was sick of the hospital. Sick of the nurses. I was mad that they woke Cordelia up to take her to another floor. I was mad at the loud nurses just outside our door who were keeping my baby awake. I was angry that Cordelia would wake up in a room that she was not used to. I was mad that I wasn't in bed yet. And now I was also out of my comfort zone. Out of the room and floor that we got so used to in our week there. Now we were someplace that we didn't know with nurses that we didn't know. And to top it all off it was Halloween. Cordelia's costume was laying at home, unused. And my boys were out trick-or-treating and I was missing it. It was the first and hopefully the last time. I know that when I keep things inside, it usually will end up exploding out in a not so good way. And that is exactly what happened that night. I thought I was handling everything so great and then the simple act of moving to another room was the final straw and I erupted. Fred reassured me that everything was going great and by moving to another floor was a good indication of how well Cordelia was doing. Still I needed to have my cry and get it all out of my system. After my cry I felt better. At least for a couple of days.

Security blanket

At home Cordelia likes to go into the laundry room, pull my shirts out and snuggle with them. On our way down to the cities Cordelia was crying from too much time in her car seat. On a stop I took a shirt out of my luggage and gave it to her. That was all it took to get her to fall asleep. After her surgery, she saw me and immediately wanted to be picked up. She kept her arms out and had the saddest look on her face because I wouldn't pick her up. Then I gave her my shirt. She grabbed it, put it against her face and immediately fell asleep. For the next week she would not let go of the shirt. When nurses came in to check her vitals, Cordelia would not let go of it. I once tried to get it out of her hands when the nurse was getting her out of the bed so I could hold her. Her grip was so tight that I could not get it from her. Now that shirt is hers. That's ok, she deserves it.

Day after surgery

The next day Cordelia was still very groggy. She would open her eyes for a little bit and then fall back to sleep. The first time she saw me that morning she extended her arms out towards me so I could pick her up. More than anything I wanted to swoop her up and snuggle her, but with so many things attached to her, I couldn't just yet. For a mother it was the worst feeling in the world. The floor doctor had come by that morning to show us the before and after x-rays. There was a definite difference. Her lung was now extended like it should and her heart was back where it belongs. Many people had told us to get out of the hospital and take some time for ourselves. After looking at the x-rays the doctor said this would be a good time for that. Cordelia was mostly sleeping and we couldn't pick her up so this was our opportunity. And for the first time in my life I was happy to have a cell phone just in case. I wanted to get a little something for the boys so we headed to the Mall of America. I knew I could find a little something at LegoLand for Rion. We also thought this might be a good opportunity to get some Christmas presents, but there weren't any good toy stores like I remember being there. We didn't buy very much at all. We did fill a huge Old Navy bag since we didn't pack enough clothes and there was some really good deals there. I did have one huge panic at Urban Outfitters when the cell phone rang. It wasn't a North Dakota area code so I searched frantically for Fred as I fumbled for the cell phone. Thankfully, it was my aunt wondering what we were doing for lunch. She then met us at the mall for lunch. It was nice to get away, but I missed the boys more than ever. We were already planning on catching a Twins game next summer and going to the mall. The boys will have so much fun at the Nickelodeon amusement park and Rion will go nuts over LegoLand. I was really wishing they were there with us that day.

The important questions

As we waited in the surgery waiting room we saw many parents talk to their child's surgeon. Most left the room, but as people left and more room was available many decided to just talk to the doctor in the waiting room. This was the case for one of the last sets of parents besides ourselves. They were sitting close to us and with the empty room we could not help but hear their conversation. There son had gotten his tonsils out and one of the first questions out of their mouths was, "When can he play hockey again?" A while back Fred and I had watch a mockamentary about hockey parents and these two could have been the basis for it. We must have heard the word hockey twenty times in the conversation. Then the doctor left and they got their laptop out and were figuring out how many practices and games their son would miss. It was all they could talk about. In the future if I ever get that crazy about my children's sports or activities I give permission to everybody to give me a quick swift kick in the head.

Day of surgery

On Monday surgery wasn't scheduled until 3:00 so it was a long wait until then. By then Cordelia was getting sick of her hospital room so we spent more time in the family room that day. After her nap and a bottle I decided to take her in the family room one more time because it would be awhile before she could play again. We were in there for about five minutes when the nurse came in and told us it was time. Once again, Fred was not in the room. He was down on second floor trying to get some paperwork done. We stopped there on our way to pre-op to get him. I think the wait in pre-op felt longer than the wait during surgery. I just wanted it to be all over with and that made it feel longer. Before surgery we had to talk to the surgeon, anesthesiologists, and nurses. Then the anesthesiologist came back to give Cordelia a "cocktail" which would relax her as they took her away from us and into surgery. It seriously took 30 seconds for the cocktail to work. Her poor little head started bobbing and she was smiling big and giggling. If I wouldn't have been laughing so hard I would have been crying as they took her away. I intended to have a big cry in the waiting room, but we were surprised to see how small and packed the waiting room was. Every other waiting room we had seen was big with not many people in it. So my crying would have to wait because I just can't cry with so many people around. We were also surprised by another modern convenience in the waiting room. A number was assigned to each child in surgery and on a big computer screen, each parent could keep track of where their child was at in the surgery. They updated the information when surgery started, when it was complete, and when the child was in the recovery room. They also made a couple of phone calls to the waiting room to keep us updated. The surgery took about two hours to complete. The time went fast because we kept our minds busy. I had a Games Magazine that I bought a couple of weeks earlier and still hadn't started. (I don't know why I thought I would have time to sit down and play games. Anyway, it came in handy that day.) Fred even helped me with some of the puzzles. I didn't know he was so good at crosswords until then. Since Cordelia's surgery was late in the afternoon, by the time the surgeon came in the waiting room we were the last ones there. He said everything went great and we would be going back up to third floor soon. There was the possibility of her going to ICU after surgery, but they were able to take the breathing tube out thus skipping out on ICU. This was a huge relief for me. We had a tour of ICU the day before and I was having a hard time there. It was almost too much to handle and it wasn't even my child hooked up to all those machines. It was really nice to be back in our private room. The rest of the day Cordelia mostly slept. When she did open her eyes, it wasn't for long. She had so many tubes and monitors attached to her. She had a tube down her nose that went into her tummy, two IVs (one from previously in her hand that wasn't hooked up to anything and one in her foot that was giving her fluids), a chest tube, an epidural, and a pulse oximeter on her toe that kept track or her breathing and heart rate. That night we spent the night at the hospital.

Minneapolis Children's Hospital

Not much happened our first weekend in Minneapolis. Cordelia's surgery was set for Monday afternoon and until then the nurses just monitored her and we tried to hydrate her as much as possible. She only threw up twice while we were there which was good. Although not much happened, the whole thing was overwhelming. We got a tour of the hospital floor we were on and we also did some exploring of the hospital on our own. I quickly learned that I did not pack enough for myself, but over packed for Cordelia. Everything was provided for her. Even toys and a stroller. There was also a free washer and dryer on the floor, which we had to use. We also used the family room often, which was stocked with toys and also gave everyone a break from the hospital room. There were also dvds to check out, which we took advantage of. As far as food there were a lot of options. The hospital cafeteria, a McDonalds, delivery and other local restaurants. The hospital also provided us with five nights at The Sheraton. The staff at the hospital was amazing. I am used to waiting forever to see anyone whenever I go to the doctor. Our first day there the nurse said the surgeon would be up to talk to us about the surgery. Thinking we had lots of time, Fred went out for a smoke. He missed half of the surgeon's explanation of everything. It was always like that. And when we asked the nurse a question or needed something, she got right on it. There was no waiting around for things there. I was also impressed by how modern and new everything looked. I guess that floor had been remodeled three years ago and it looked really good. We had a very nice futon couch in the room and the toys in the family room were all new and in good shape. It just made me feel like they really care for their patients.

Mr. Mom

Two days after Cordelia's surgery, my mom also had surgery, but this one was planned. I told my dad we could make arrangements for the boys so he wouldn't have them while my mom was in the hospital. He said that was ok, he could watch the boys. The day after my mom's surgery I made my nightly call home. I was trying to have a conversation with my dad, but he kept talking to the boys while talking to me. I could hear the boys in the background and my dad, "watch where you're going," and "don't do that boys." I had a deep satisfaction in hearing my dad trying to deal with the boys and have a phone conversation. Another night my dad told me he was exhausted. And I smiled. Big. Now I never want to hear him ask me why I haven't done such and such or when am I going to do whatever. And yes, I know my house is messy. Maybe now he has an idea why. And he didn't even have all three kids or a job to go to and then come home to another much harder job. My mom is also getting much satisfaction in the fact that my dad has to do laundry for the next six weeks. My mom is under doctor's orders not to do anything strenuous, including laundry. My dad is learning so much in retirement. So when I was feeling down at the hospital all I had to do was think of my dad taking Rion to school everyday, having to buy a birthday gift, taking the boys to the birthday party, and all of the other everyday things that he has never had to do. And it made me smile. Big.

Chaos

As I talked to Cordelia's doctor on the phone a million thoughts were running through my mind. The doctor gave me the names of the doctors he had talked to and where we needed to be. When he asked if I had any questions, I couldn't think of any even though there were a million in my mind. It was just too overwhelming to process anything. At that time as relatives were asking questions about what was going on, I really didn't have a good answer. I wasn't exactly sure what was going on with Cordelia. I didn't know how long we would be in Minneapolis. I didn't know when the surgery would take place. Now we know that Cordelia had a diaphragmic hernia. Basically, there was a hole in her diaphragm and as she got older, the hole got bigger and eventually all of her small intestines and some of her big intestine slipped up through the hole and into her chest. This was causing her to throw up and more seriously the intestines were taking up the room where her heart and lungs would normally be. She was lucky enough to not have very serious breathing problems or we would have been rushed to Minneapolis in an ambulance. Instead we drove down there. To add to all of this there was the issue of what to do with the boys. Normally they would go to my parents, but they were going to Fargo for the weekend. And on top of everything Fred's mom was in Fargo at Fred's aunt's house getting ready to drive to our house the same day we were suppose to go to Minneapolis. We ended up dropping the boys off with Fred's mom over the weekend and then my parents took the boys back to Bismarck on Sunday. Fred did not get to see his mom while she was here, but at least she got to spend some quality time with the boys. And as the weekend unfolded we got more information about how much time we would be spending in the cities. It looked like my dad would get to be Mr. Mom for awhile.....

An unexpected trip

As a parent I have come to expect the unexpected. Still, I was not prepared to deal with anything like this past nine days. About a month ago Cordelia started throwing up every night in bed. When this started her and I were just getting over a nasty cold so we didn't think much of it. When it just wouldn't go away I took her to the walk-in clinic. We got some medicine, but that didn't help. I tried to get her an appointment to her pediatrician, but he was on vacation. So again, we went to the walk-in. This time we got some antibiotics and for a week she didn't throw up once. Then the throwing up started again and more frequently. We waited until her one year appointment that was scheduled later in the week. The doctor was concerned about her weight and what he heard when he listened to her chest. We spent three hours at the clinic that day doing a sweat test for cystic fibrosis, an x-ray and a second visit with the doctor. The clinic was also super busy that day because there was no school and kids kept coming in for flu shots. After all the tests were in, the doctor said he knew what the problem was as we walked back into a room to see the x-ray. That walk seemed to take forever as all the terrible thoughts of what could be wrong with my girl filled my brain. We now know that Cordelia had a diaphragmic hernia and we would have to go to Minneapolis soon for surgery. A half hour after I got home, the doctor called to say he talked to someone in Minneapolis and they wanted us there the next day. What followed was a mad dash to get ourselves ready for our very unplanned trip. There are so many stories to share about this so it will dominate the blog for awhile. The computers available at the hospital did not allow blog access so I couldn't do any blogging while there. So I have a lot of catching up to do.